What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

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Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

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R.I.P. Steve Jobs

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

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I am a joke. I am funny.

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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That's illegal What? Your mom

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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What does an Ethiopian hula-hoop with? A Cheerios JimBoto

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Whats has no comedic value? A brick

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Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a fox? An eaten chicken.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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What Batman said to Robin before they got in the car? -Get in the car Robin!

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops