You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

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Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

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Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange

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Velcro. What a rip off.

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once you go black your credit goes wack

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Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

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What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

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whoever said we're all soft on the inside was probably not an experienced doctor.

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Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

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What is white and black and red all over.

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

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Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

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Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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What do you call someone who is unwilfully forced into a life of emotional abuse and domestic violence? My daughter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops