What's did the white man say to the black man? Howdy.

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I've got the whole world! In my hands! I've got the whole world! In my hands! I've got the whole world! In my hands! Now you must listen to all of my demands or I will crush you all.

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A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

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Three Greeks and Three Turks are traveling by train to a conference. Both racial groups arrive safely to their destination.

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Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

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Caroline Kelly.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

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why cant stevie wonder read? because hes black

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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fi uoy nac daer siht sdrawkcab uoy tsuj daer siht sdrawkcab

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What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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