hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

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If there's something strange in the neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police, because it's obviously a darky that's up to no good.

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Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

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Q. what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? A. nothing you done told her twice already

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Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

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Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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black people are white when i use night gogles

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Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

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why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

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How many girls does ittake to screw in a lightbulb? Doesnt matter as long as dinner is on the table by 6:00

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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Why was the comedian so funny? Because that's his job, and if he wasn't funny he would have to become a hobo.

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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Which side of an ostrich has the most feathers? Obviously the outside! Who would be so low educated to even have the idea that an ostrich can have feathers on the inside of it's body?

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven has cold, dead eyes.

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2 Penises

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What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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