A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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A blonde walks into a bar. Shes now in a coma.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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Yo momma is so stupid people make fun of her for her learning disability

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like to rhyme Microwave.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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What's big, hairy and smells like sweat? The big show after a hard days work in the ring.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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bronson watt walks into a bar.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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What did the fish say after he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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