Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

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What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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your sister has 1 boob thats funny

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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How do you kill a circus? Assuming this is metaphorical usage of the word 'kill', you would withdraw funds, involve the SPCA and offer all the major performers better contracts elsewhere.

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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Why am I righting in english? Because this is an english site.

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How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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Why didn't the boy come out of the closet? He had no legs.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

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facebook is like a refrigerator. you eat it.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

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Women.

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What do you get when you cross the color pink and pie? A penis ate the answer.

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Knock Knock. I paid good money for a doorbell. Use it, please.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

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A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

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Why did priences Dian cross the street? Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops