Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

why did winnie the pooh have his head in the toilet,? it was clogged.

Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

a duck walks in to a gay bar and asks for a stick they asked where he wanted it before he could answer he was rapped

how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

What did the black man say to the asian man? hello.

You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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