whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

Black, det er geita, banke driten ut av Anders, han griner, dreper ikke, vil du ha telefonen eller? Jeg kommer med den litt senere, skal bare tørke blodet først pønsha han hardt i tryne blør ifra knyttnevene, skal jeg knekke bena på han eller noe? Geita. Ps Pen fitte har du flere bilder av a elle? Hvilket rom?

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

Bob: You need to push harder? Tom: Oh wow what a coincidence, that is what my wife said last night. They laugh about the irony of the situation and then return to the task at hand

I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

If 6 is afraid of 7, what is 7 afraid of? ...Chuck Norris.

What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

what is similar between a mexican and a bench? they are both illeageal. except the bench

Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

Why did the farmer name his pig "ink"? He had a terrible case of dementia.

Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

This dog can only sniff marijuana.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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