What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

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Penis.

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You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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What did the black man say to the asian man? hello.

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What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

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here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

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A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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A ninja walked into a dojo and was kindly greeted by his master.

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A postal worker creeps past a sleeping bulldog. The dog does not wake up, and the mail is delivered successfully.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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