What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Wii.

Whats worse than losing your car keys? Watching your 4 year old son get visciously raped by a 20stone sex hungry pedophile and knowing you cant do anything about it because the sex hungry pedophile is your dad and he is the alpha male of the family so he has full mating rights.

I was Born ready I was born naked.

Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

The WNBA.

Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

Why did the guy lie down? He was dead.

What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

a turtle walks into a bar and eats everyone

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

A: Knock Knock B: ...

So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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