Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

A baby seal walks into a club.

What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

learn the ropes?

Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

What do you call a seagull that flew into the bay? Wet.

Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

I went to school. Then I came home.

Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...