Me "knock knock" Tramp "who's there" Me "nobody you havent got a door"

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-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

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a blond a her blond boyfriend were walking acrossed a river. she gose over the river but the ramp brecks when she's past. her boyfriend says wait until night and I'll get a flashlight and shine it acrossed get on the light beem and walk acrossed.she says no when I'm haf way acrossed you will turn the light off.

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Q: Whats the difference between a pile of dead babys and a Ferrari? A: I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Doctor everybody that I stare at seems to die moments later! Uh, why are you looking at me so intensely... >:)

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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Dude, i know this guy, who knew this guy named Ben, who knew this guy named Valen, who knew this guy named Chad and he said.... Ben's Dead.

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A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

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Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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01010010001010010100100101001001010010100100100100100100100100100100100100010010101010101010101011010101010110010101010 Dolphin

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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Q: Why doesn't the Mexican belong in St. Louis? A: Because he ran away from home, his family lives in Kansas City.

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How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

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kesha is a virgin.

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Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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