What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

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Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

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I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

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Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance cocvered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being deined coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be covered." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

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CRY

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spell backwards: taco cat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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