what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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Why didn't the puppy play with his toys? They were poisonous.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no hands.

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The Kidder vs Bratman, not featuring Robbing the gay wonder: "MUHAHAhAha Bratman if you get me ill kill myself!" HOHOHOHO. "Uh okay" "I totally will!" "Go ahead" "I promise!" Bratman kills the Kidder as a favor, and no crime runs around Goodham city ever the end. Moral: Totally original nothing stolen from Joker and the Batman.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

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John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

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A muslim walks pass a bomb shop on his way to the international peace club.

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Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

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I just drank a cola.

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A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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