DON"T READ THIS!

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life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

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i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

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do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he yelled and held his head in pain. :) www.youtube.com/c/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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How do you make a dentist cry? Rape him in the ass.

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What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

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why can stevie wonder drive? He's blind

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

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A black man walks Into a bar.

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Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realizing the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

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What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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