Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

Who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? The same Griffin Kid.

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

How many jews can you fit into an ash-tray? none because the volume of a human is much greater than an any ash-tray

Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

what do you throw at a mexican man when he is drowning? his family.

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

A man penetrates another man.

yo' Mamma's so fat when she stepped on the scale, she said "hey, that's my phone number"!

do you have a wife?

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

What's black and dangerous? A fridge, I lied about the black part.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

Whats black and red inside? A black guy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...