So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

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How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

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Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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whats purple and brown lucozade sport

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A street performer was sitting on a curb playing guitar when a black man walked up and put some money in the guitar case. The street performer nodded in appreciation of the man's donation and continued to play his instrument.

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A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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