What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz he does what he wants.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

thumb_up thumb_down +47

whats worse than getting raped by your mom getrting raped by a giant scorpian

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

poop nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

thumb_up thumb_down +39

im at school

thumb_up thumb_down +39

i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

thumb_up thumb_down +39

"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops