How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

An African-American man calls KFC. An employee answers. "Thank you for calling KFC." The man replies, "I'm sorry, I must have dialed the wrong number."

Pete and Repeat are sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off and Repeat still hasn't been able to forgive himself for pressuring Pete to join him on such a perilous perch.

Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

An asian man walks into a taxi. The driver asked which chinese or electronic store woupd u like to go to?

Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

Call me a banana. You're a banana. No I'm not

what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

aodhan hearty

What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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