Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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The Kidder vs Bratman, not featuring Robbing the gay wonder: "MUHAHAhAha Bratman if you get me ill kill myself!" HOHOHOHO. "Uh okay" "I totally will!" "Go ahead" "I promise!" Bratman kills the Kidder as a favor, and no crime runs around Goodham city ever the end. Moral: Totally original nothing stolen from Joker and the Batman.

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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Two black men walk into a strip club. They immediately walk out because they have faithful wives at home nurturing their beautiful African children.

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What did the skinny man say to the fat woman. That sucks.

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why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

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Susie fell of a swing and died Knock Knock Who's there Susie

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knock knock whos there knock knock whos there knock knock whos there poor billy didnt know that the knocking was just a tree branch and he stayed asking the same question for 21 years

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What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

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epic win?

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

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What do people and jelly beans have in common? Nothing. One is a living creature, and the other is a tasty treat.

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Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to properly balance himself.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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Religionh

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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