2 + 2 = fish

Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

How do you become a multi-trilionere? Get bored...

Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

Why did the middle-eastern man fly his plane into the Empire State Building? Because he was a bad pilot with an interest in American architecture.

A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

What did the mute say to the deaf man?

Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

Knock knock. Whose There? Megan Megan Who? Your Wife...

What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

So, how 'bout that airline food?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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