hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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20

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385

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

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A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

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So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

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68

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops