Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Where is my tractor?

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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How are you this morning?

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Fat people.

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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