Fat people.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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Q: What was Jerry Sandusky's defensive philosophy at Penn State? A: Get penetration and always cover the Tight End.

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What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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So you there Red?

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Miley Cyrus.

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He ate too much cake.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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