What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

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what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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20

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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Where is my tractor?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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