Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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a woman votes!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there?

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Where's my tractor?

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

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What killed the name cool? Coolio

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why was the asian women such a bad driver? she was blind and had no arms

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What do you call a 46 year old man with one eye 4'5 and has one arm coming out of his chest Steve

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There would not be any me in we, you would have to hijack a media station, you would instantly be branded terrorists, and even if you where not, do you believe that you could have used the media in order to spread individuality, or would you simply have sought to control the masses like the rest? I am not saying that television is wrong, I am saying that as long as there are not enough people willing to think for themselves, and remain loyal to us and themselves, something which we failed at when we where at our greatest peak, then we are all media zombies eventually, and I do not mind, complacency is better than a constant struggle for survival.

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Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

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Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I know.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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What do you call a poor Donald Trump? Donald Trump

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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Chuck norris

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops