- Anti Joke

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said: ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.

Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

A priest, rabbi, and a monk are sitting on a plane. One is in first class, one is in business class, and one is in coach. It turns out they're all going to the same interfaith conference.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm wearing pants and I'm hungry

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

PLEASE LIKE TO DONATE 50 CENTS TO MY CHARIDY .... SAVE THE PENGUINS IN AFRICA -BY LUKE BRANIFF

What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said: ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.

CRY

Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

Women outside of the kitchen.

A horse walks into a barn.

Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

A priest, rabbi, and a monk are sitting on a plane. One is in first class, one is in business class, and one is in coach. It turns out they're all going to the same interfaith conference.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

#Cutforbieber - Cole g.

How does a black woman know she is pregnant? When she pulls her tampon out the cotton is already picked.

Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??