What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

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Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

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*prepares this to get negative votes*

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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There is no I in Pie except for the I

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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roses are red violets should be purple

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Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

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Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

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What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

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What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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What's green and smells like yellow paint? Green paint.

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So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

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Its easy they said, just type your text below they said, so I did

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What happened to the Mexican who commited suicide? He died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

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An early jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops