- Anti Joke

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

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A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

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What did the hispanic guy say after he took a bite out of a McDonald's hot n' spicy chicken sandwhich. I'm lovin' it.

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Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

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Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

When Michael Jackson was making his last son, he named him Blanket... he was cold.

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

Roses are red Viloets are unicorns this? doesn't make sense Refridgeator

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's.

Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

Joke.

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

Why was the black man forced off of the roller coaster He had heart disease

jibby jobby

I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

how do u keep a stupid person in suspense? how

What did the hispanic guy say after he took a bite out of a McDonald's hot n' spicy chicken sandwhich. I'm lovin' it.

Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??