My children are huge mistakes.

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

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Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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Get off my porch.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Row, row, row your... Canoe.

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What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

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Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

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So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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What did Einstein say to the blonde? 'What specific part of the theory don't you understand?'

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What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

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Knock knock. Why are you saying that, you should actually knock the door. Oh ok.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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