whos district champs not JM

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

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gabbi nunez ;)

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

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what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

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nock nock who's there? bob bob who? bob franklin let me in 'cause i'm freezing!

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you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

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whats worse than gill? nothing

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What's long, brown, and runs across a family's backward? A fence.

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Why did peter fall off his bike? Because Peter is a goldfish.

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

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Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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