A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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How many Jews can you fit into a 1968 Caddy? 1 in the front, 2 in the back, and 200 in the ash tray.

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jwe

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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What did the midget say to the leprechaun? Nothing.....midgets don't usually converse with leprechauns....and leprechauns aren't real.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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'Knock Knock' 'Who's there?' 'My name is Boo, I'm sorry,I think I was given the wrong address, I'll be on my way now' Boo walks away from the unsuspecting person's front door and goes to the next house along in the hope of finding the house he was originally searching for.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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Oh, right

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops