Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

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Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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Me: Want to hear a funny joke? Person: What? Me: Women's Right.

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Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

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Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of the bar? He was riding a jack hammer

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

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Roses are Red You're Black and Blue My fists seemed to have taken A liking to you

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Why is pi? Because circles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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