What do you call a black man walking home in the dark after a long day at work? His name you racist

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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Knock Knock, Who's There? The The Who? YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

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Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Wanna hear a joke? Yes Then go on the internet and find some jokes.

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Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

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Is your refrigerator running? no then your food is probably beginning to rot

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't. Before it could cross, it was killed and then consumed by an average American

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what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

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Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

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When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do you do with a dead black man? Respect his final wishes and provide him with proper funeral services.

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

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RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops