what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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a man was walking and saw a snake he was not afraid of snakes so he kept walking

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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Hello, I'm David and I just stabbed my aunt in the eye. Just kidding, my name isn't David. That was an Aunt Eye(anti) joke.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

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sky's the limit said the tree a.w. j.p.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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Why did little Jonny drop his ice cream? He was his by a bus? Why did the Kuala fall out the tree? Because it died.

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why did the black man attend the AA meeting? his wife told him the only way she would stay with him is if he would attend these meetings, he was an alcoholic and is dying of liver failure.

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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What did the woman say just before she was stabbed eleven times in the chest thus killing her? Nothing, she had been gagged.

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What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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oooh look a banshee

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What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

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what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

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What do you get when you cross a hippo with a dishwasher? 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7

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Steve Mullings isn't on drugs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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