Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

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It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

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a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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Knock knock! who's there? Excuse me sir can I have a moment to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? ... ... He committed suicide for the simple reason that the soviet and allied forces were closing in on him and he knew that he did not stand a chance of winning the war.

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Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

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You so dumb that you weighed 100 pounds and ate a peanut and weighed 500 pounds!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? Steve Johnson, and I'm legally obligated to inform you that I'm a sex offender.

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What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

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Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

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where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

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Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

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Why did the boy sharpen his pencil it was dull

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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what's brown and sticky A stick!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she lost her balance.

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yo moma is so poor she cant afford free samples

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because as an animal with legs it is highly capable of doing such as it pleases.

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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