how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

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Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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WHO WANTS SOW????

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? They were both once alive and innocent, I lied about the black guy.

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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what did the special ed kid get on his iq test? drool

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Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

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What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

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What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

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How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

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A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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An Amish man walks into a bar. He then orders a non-alcoholic beverage due to the temperance practices of the Amish faith.

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what do u call a black person by his name

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops