Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their firstborn child.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get in the car.

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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what are the three types of rings? -wedding ring -engagement ring -suffering

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You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

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whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

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They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

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whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops