What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

whats one plus one penis

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind.

What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

rishi is gay (coventry england)

Knock Knock Go Away

How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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