How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the burglar get arrested? For beating an egg

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how did the man die from falling out of the window his angry x- friend pushed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Dylan F fell off a bridge Landed in some water and was ok 2 days later he got bit by a shark He is now in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the guy die? He had a fatal heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My dads so gay he has sex with other men for fun.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why was the black man blind? because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

thumb_up thumb_down -5

...IIITS... :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW ITS :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW! :) YAY! :(SHADDAP YUUU! Episode one... The waiting for the wait!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When life gives you lemons, make beef stew.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is yellow and corny? Corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops