Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

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I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

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Guy 1: Hey, did you hear about this blind guy who went bungee jumping off a bridge? Guy 2: No, what happened? Guy 1: He couldn't see Jack!

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What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

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where do some birds live in? Earth

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

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What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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What time do you go to the dentist? Depends on the appointment.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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♪ It's raining. It's pouring. ♪ The old man caught pneumonia and died....

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

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why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

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Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

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People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

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monkeys that understand what people say dont understand what people say because they understand CC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops