Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, orange!

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

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a jew walks out of a furnace

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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a woman votes!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

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Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

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rarw

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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What do you get when you cross chocolate pudding with your mother's slippers? A spanking.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops