How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

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MOOOOOOOOOOO

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Q: Why did the little boy who just got over a terrible sore throat fall down the stairs? A: His legs were brutally torn off by wolves.

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What is a black man's favorite fast food restauraunt? Varies.

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

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What did the red-haired barber say to the father who abandoned him at birth? Nothing. The father sat to the side and read a magazine as the barber cut the hair of his legitimate child, failing to recognize the irony of the situation.

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What do vampires cross the sea in?

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why did the indian kill the buffalo? he was suffering from a psychological disorder and took to killing innocent animals in order to relieve the pent up rage caused by repressed memories of childhood abuse.

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What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

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What did the President give his wife for her birthday? Women's Rights.

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What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

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This is my first joke don't ????mine. You did didn't you.

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

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How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

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What's more funny than an anti-joke? A joke.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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Yo mama so fat She could die any day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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