why did the computer crash? it didn't

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is bigger.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Q. I'm not hot, I'm not cold I'm not young, I'm not old I'm not lame, I'm not cool I'm not smart, and I'm not a fool. What am I? A. Text

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A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Alzheimer who? Knock knock.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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I am reading the Terms of Service, however I don't fully agree with it's contents.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

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Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

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Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

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Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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