what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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Republicans

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Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

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DESERT

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what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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No.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

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A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

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Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

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What's up? The sky. What's down? Your mom: she was stabbed

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

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What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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what happens when you put samuel jackson on a plane with snakes? They make a movie

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

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Have you seen Ray Charles' house? No. Neither has he...

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why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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