Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

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A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

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You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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My kids are mistakes.

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YouTube Is Red Facebook Is Blue Porn Hub Is Down You'll Have To Do

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What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

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what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

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Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

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Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

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Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road? To get to the other side.

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

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The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

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What's a ghost's favourite country? Fraaaaance.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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