try slamming a revolving door

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

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Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

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Why did the mean have to clean up the mass amount of dead bodies? Because he lost a game of rock-paper-scissors.

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What did the black man do with the white mans stolen bike? He returned it after finding it outside a local shopping mall.

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Why was the 3 year old high He was flying

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

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what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

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How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

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Jerry.

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Two gorillas walked into a bar and it hurt

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69

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

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Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops