A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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How is an orange like an airplane? They both have wings except an orange doesn't have wings

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What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

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What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

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What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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Why did the girl get robbed? Because her door was unlocked.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

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24

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How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

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Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

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Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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A black man walks into a bar and is proptly told to leave. He proceeds to sue the bar owner, then buys the bar and turns it into a community center that helps at risk children.

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Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

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know whats funnier than 24? 25.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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