Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

"Hey want to hear the best knock-knock joke ever." "Sure." "Ok you start." "Knock-knock." "Whos there?" "..........."

Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

knock knock hold on im takin a poop!

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Well neither has he.

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

24

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

The WNBA

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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