a man walks into a bar, and says "can i get a beer please?" the bartender hands him his beer, and as soon as the man starts to take a drink, the man dies of a massive heart attack because of his unhealthy lifestyle

roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up you retarded poet!

Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

What was the leg less and armless mans favorite type of music? Nubstep

Haikus are easy. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

What do a turtle and a tree have in common? They both can fly except for the turtle............and the tree

what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Two muffins are in the oven, One says "Damn it, so hot in here," The other one says " Wow! Muffin which can talk!"

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

A muslim is working quietly in his 3rd floor apartment complex bedroom. ~~~~ He's been working on high explosives for 8 months now, preparing to kill innocent people.

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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