knock knock who's there who who who and if u say something about an I will punch u in the face u stupid cike!!!!

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

What's brown and sticky? A Stick

These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

book 'em danno

What's a fat chinaman? A guy who somehow got obese on rice. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!

What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

xavier stop

guy walks into a bar, ouch

Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

your mom gave me head.....phones

2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

My daughter is dying of AIDS.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a cannibal.

HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up you retarded poet!

Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

Haikus are easy. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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